Dust in the Wind
by NeverWillBe
Summary: "He… had a smile on. She didn't even have a tear to spare, just because…" A witness recounts Ichimaru Gin's last moments. Did love cause his twisted way of life? Whatever the answer, Rangiku has no regrets having loved such an abomination. GinRan 1-shot.


Yes, this is dedicated to all Gin fans out there who are hanging onto their seats and praying hard for him to stay alive. However, this isn't exactly a happily-ever-after story, so you've been warned.

Also, Byakuya and Rukia appears in most part of this fic, and the status of their relationship... Well, that's entirely up to you.

Somewhere near the end, I inserted lyrics of Forever (by Stratovarius) because it's been replaying in my head ever since I started writing this fic.

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach.

Please **read and review**. I might make this into a multi-chapter story.

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**DUST IN THE WIND**

"Kuchiki-taicho."

"A report from Ukitake-taicho?" The man behind the desk glanced up at the kneeling shinigami for a brief moment before resuming his rhythmic brush strokes, an aristocratic hand moving swiftly across a document. A thick stack of similar sheets was visible, deposited on the left end of his desk. Writing about war was never pleasant and his mood was exceptionally bad.

"No," the girl replied with a detached tone, her eyes shining with a rare glint of determination—it was never easy to stare hard at the Sixth Division captain and her…unusual relation to the man made everything worse, but she had to do this… This bizarre and totally unnecessary…

"What is it then, Rukia?" She could tell from his minute frown and the slight tension of his right hand that her time was almost up. His patience was wearing thin. The sounds of reconstruction rang through the building, the unwanted noise emphasizing his unwillingness to entertain spontaneous and pointless visits. _What does she want? Has the Winter War damaged her so badly that she seeks his comfort even during working hours?_

"Perhaps you have heard, but I have to tell… And I apologize for interrupting your work for such a pathetic reason, a… personal reason," she replied stupidly, fully aware that she was just stalling him. He set his brush on the table and finally gave her his full attention, but his face was still tight with subtle impatience. She unknowingly lowered her head, the strange force of noble manners pulling her usual proud posture down towards the floorboard.

He didn't speak, opting to give her a prompt to begin with a generous gesture—compressing his spirit aura to a new low, to an extent that was normally impossible for a shinigami of captain rank. She felt the air loosen around her, and became suddenly aware that it was comfortable to sigh and slouch like a defeated warrior.

"I…" she began, "I was at the Fourth Division barracks earlier today. The news is out. The official word from Unohana-taicho was that…" she stiffened, but forced herself to look him in the eye, against the natural instinct to flinch away under his scrutiny. "He died. Just before dawn. Unohana-taicho's bankai managed to keep him breathing long enough for Matsumoto-fukutaicho to arrive. She was tended to in a nearby ward. They said it was like a miracle when she bolted up from her bed and rushed to his side only to watch him… fade away in the matter of seconds."

His eyes softened and he gave a nod in reply, signaling her to continue.

"I have to admit… my emotions got me, despite so many years of training from the Elders. Nii-sama, I…"she swallowed, noting that it was inappropriate to address him as her brother in the office. And that she was fond of calling him that. No one else could, after all.

"Ichimaru Gin's death bothers you?"

She was silent for a while. Her eyes fell once again to the ground, "I was allowed to take one last look at him. It was as though, for that moment, as people stood paralyzed around his death bed, they were anything but themselves. The shinigamis looked at his dead body like hollows… like hollows crying out in pain as we stab them with our swords. Everything was empty. They didn't have enough reason to cry so they didn't, but Rangiku-san… I saw her face, Nii-sama. She's as good as dead. Didn't even have a tear to spare because, just because…" Rukia's voice broke and she steadied herself with a deep breath, focusing on the quickly drying ink brush in front of her.

Yet, alive in her mind was that murderous night, Kaien slumped on her shoulder, his breath thick with blood next to her ear. Hundred years of courage and battles dulled her pain. She no longer loved him, but she remembered.

Rukia felt her vision blur away. "She said… 'It's rare to see you so asleep, Gin. I was always the one who sleeps first and you always leave before the break of dawn.'" _Kaien's cold hand on her arm. Byakuya's blood staining her white robes on the day of Betrayal. The discovery of her sister's shrine. A photo of Ichigo's mother. Renji's laughter during a childhood game. Hinamori's cry of pain from Hitsugaya's stab…_ Her mind was a ruckus! But she had to tell him, to leave it off her chest. "Unohana-taicho left the room then, and the men followed. I watched. A few others were crying. He… still had a smile on. But a _different_ one—it… looked like yours."

Byakuya studied Rukia intently and his brow visibly arched at the last comment. "Hnn," he responded. She took the cue and spoke again.

"She had it too. A heartbreaking smile on her face as she held his hand. She probably wanted to cry, but I guess she couldn't. Because she knows that from now on he will never leave… She will… always know where he is." Droplets fell, mini thuds sounded as they hit the floorboard. Rukia raised a hand to rub her eyes. Her vision was getting too cloudy for her liking.

Byakuya wasn't surprised by her tears. "Rukia," he called out, a serious expression intact.

"I'm sorry!"

"I do not blame you for your honesty," he stood up and flashed to crouch next to her. "I never deny you the capacity to love. It is expected that the pain of losing a loved one is relatable to you. However, having cross blades with Ichimaru, I am convinced that he lived without regrets. Perhaps he expected the same from her—to never regret having loved an abomination. " He placed a hand on her shaking shoulders, his voice soothing, but the bitterness of his words washed her with grief. "She didn't have tears for her loss, nor does she have room for regrets and what-if's. And yet here you are crying for them. How silly."

Rukia slowed her sobs, looking into his eyes, she spoke with conviction. "He loves her."

"I know."

"He was always leaving her behind, perhaps just to warn her that a day like this would come. His loneliness was enough punishment…"

"Perhaps. But I cannot simply overlook the fact that he almost killed you on Sokyouku Hill, Rukia. I will not allow you to be upset over the likes of him."

Rukia forced a small smile, "An abomination, you said?" Who knew, that a monster could love this much? Or did love transform the once innocent into a vengeful murderer? Whatever the answer, as Rukia dried her tears in Byakuya's gentle embrace, she murmured under her breath, "Nii-sama, please don't die before me."

I stand alone in the darkness—

the winter of my life came so fast!

Memories go back to childhood,

today I still recall, oh,

how happy I was then.

There was no sorrow, there was no pain.

Walking through

the green fields,

sunshine's in my eyes.

I'm still there

everywhere; I'm the dust in the wind.

I'm the star in the Northern sky!

Never stayed anywhere; I'm the wind in the trees,

So would you wait

for me forever?

Rangiku was the last to leave Gin's ward. The Fourth Division squad members stared at her worriedly as she limped out of the opened door. Still tear-free and a pretty smile in place, she reluctantly turned to look at him for the very last time. His silver hair had fallen across his eyes. Lying under the light of sunrise he looked like a fallen angel.

"It was worth the wait, Gin. You came back at last."

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**PLEASE READ AND REVIEW. WRITING ABOUT GINRAN USING RUKIA'S PERSPECTIVE WAS A RISKY MOVE, AND I REALLY WANT TO KNOW IF THAT WORKED OUT WELL. CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM IS ESPECIALLY WELCOMED.**

**ALSO, FOR THOSE WHO ENJOYED THIS ONE, DO CHECK OUT "DEAREST", ANOTHER ONE-SHOT ON GINRAN.  
**


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